First Float with an Open Mind

I experienced my first float and to say that I was in a relaxed state would be an understatement. Float Seattle opened my mind to other avenues of self-care in so many ways. Through my non-profit, Keep Choosing Life, I advocate for self-care so much and there are so many benefits when it is incorporated into your daily or weekly routines. I wanted to try Float Seattle because of all the amazing benefits that floating has to offer for physical, emotional, and mental health.

I went in with an open mind and I am so thankful I did. I went to the Greenwood location and Jake made my first experience so memorable. He was so informative and immediately made me feel welcome and comfortable. Once in the room, I stripped down and showered. I could already feel all the stress starting to leave my body which made me even more excited to get into the float pod. Once inside, I immediately closed the tank and turned off the main light. The pod I was in had twinkle lights that imitated stars in the sky that made it very comforting at the beginning.

I slowly laid back, closed my eyes, and focused on my breathing. Breathing in for odd numbers and breathing out for even. I raised my arms above my head and continued to focus on my breathing even more. And then for the first time in my 23 years of living, I was able to clear my mind. It was completely blank.
The first thought that came to my mind was when I self-harmed for the first time. I was 13 years old and holding a razor blade. The memory was so clear to me - I started to cry. I saw her sitting on her bed, shorts rolled up, and the blades carving “I’m sorry” into her thigh. I felt the emotions of that moment in my heart. I wanted to tell that girl who felt absolutely worthless that she is in fact worth it and that things will get better. And that she would be so proud of who she grows up to be because she turned her pain into something great. The tears transitioned to being tears of gratitude when the memory of my first fundraising event came forward. I remember standing on the stage and saying thank you to everyone who supported me and supported Keep Choosing Life. That little girl filled with so much pain for so many years was able to see one of her dreams come true because she chose to keep living.

After these memories phased out, I was back at a blank state. Again, focusing on my breathing. The next memory that came forward was one of my dad. I was 16 and this was right after I told my parents that I was wanting to kill myself for years and was actively trying. I ran upstairs to my bathroom and was crying and my dad had come upstairs to see if I was okay. He hugged me and said “whatever you do, please don’t do it”. I was crying as this memory was replaying in my head.

These are memories that I haven’t thought about in a long time and they sit very heavy on my heart. I truly do not think I would have been able to experience them in the way I did if it were not for the meditative state I achieved from floating. I am now relaxed, but I am full of gratitude, happiness, and overall, just a wholesome feeling.

Thank you Float Seattle and thank you Jake, I promise I will be returning soon.

—Savannah